Good morning on this fine Wednesday, where I am linking up with Jenn and Meghan to share yesterday’s food with you! I don’t know if it was the luck of Saint Patrick’s Day or something else, but I had a fantastic day yesterday.
I decided that I wanted to challenge myself and mix up my meals and snacks yesterday because it is far too easy for me to get in my head regarding calorie counts and comparisons when I eat the same things all of the time. If I eat the things that I used to eat, in the amounts that I used to eat them because I am afraid of stepping out of my comfort zone, I am appeasing my disorder and limiting myself. Plus, I figured that my food choices should at least be a little interesting if I’m sharing them with the general public.
I started off my St. Patrick’s Day right by eating oatmeal (and wearing green, duh). This is in no way a variation from my usual breakfast, but I love oatmeal and it is something I look forward to every morning. I also knew that the day’s food challenges would be difficult, so I wanted to start my morning strong with a favorite breakfast that feels very comfortable to me.
A little ways into the morning, I was hungry and in dire need of some caffeine. I had a small part of a peanut butter bran muffin alongside my americano misto, followed by a few almonds and the last of my coffee. Have no fear, though – the best thing about working at a coffee shop is that there is always more coffee.
For my lunch, I decided to make a salad consisting of two hardboiled eggs, some avocado, a bunch of vegetables, and pear gorgonzola vinaigrette. With some added salt and pepper, it was divine. I also had a cup of roasted red pepper and tomato soup topped with flax tortilla chip crumbs, as well as some local, whole milk greek yogurt that my coworker brought in. I can’t even begin to explain the perfection that is this yogurt. If I could, I would bathe in it.
A while after my lunch, I was feeling a bit peckish again. I sliced up an apple, which I ate with a small spread of goat cheese and a drizzle of honey.
After I got home from work, I ran a few errands and whipped myself up a snack. I have been craving popcorn for days, so I popped some up and enjoyed it with a little butter, garlic powder, salt, and (too much) cayenne pepper. The popcorn was a fancy Amish kind from Indiana with three different colors of kernels in it, and it wasn’t nearly as burned as it looks in the picture. I swear. I ate my popcorn with a square of dark chocolate because no day is complete without chocolate.
I did a (very short) yoga video and caught up with a friend of mine over FaceTime. I had plans to go out for drinks and dancing for St. Patrick’s Day after dinner, so I grabbed some sushi and miso soup from the grocery store to eat before I left. I also made a little cucumber and carrot salad with rice vinegar to go with my Japanese-themed meal.
While out dancing, I drank a few sips of a beer. To be honest, I wasn’t much of a beer drinker pre-eating disorder, so a small taste is enough for me. Of course, disordered red flags go off when I drink something like beer. Beer! Carbs! Empty calories! And, to those thoughts I say, “Who the fuck cares? I’m having fun.”
Going out was fun, but I have the soul of an eighty-year-old woman and I was pretty tired by about 10:30. I headed home and had a bedtime snack, which was not peanut butter toast. Now, I love peanut butter toast and it will probably make an appearance again today, but I figured I should go all out with my food challenges since my day had been so strong as far as recovery was concerned. Instead of toast, I had two of these cookies with a little glass of milk.
It has taken me a long time to get to a place in recovery where I can challenge myself like I did yesterday, far longer than I ever expected. It’s hard for me to believe that I was the girl who weighed almonds and measured out everything in teaspoons and tablespoons. Getting here has taken time, patience, and baby steps, but being here is incredibly freeing. When you don’t have all of the calorie counts of what you usually eat or used to eat in your head, you can truly begin to listen to your body. I’m not entirely there yet, but days like yesterday give me immense hope.
I hope your St. Patrick’s Day was fun and safe, and I will see you back here tomorrow for some Thinking Out Loud!