Happy Wednesday, everybody! I’m linking up with Peas and Crayons again this week to share a day of foodstuffs with you. It has been a week of transition for me, as I’ve been moving everything into the house I will be staying in for the next two months and getting all cozied in. The homeowners are from Japan, so they have some really interesting things around their house, which I have thoroughly enjoyed exploring. I’m especially intrigued and delighted by their selection of dishes, a small obsession of mine.
Despite my new surroundings, breakfast was business as usual, although I got to eat out of an adorable Japanese bowl.
Just look at that cute little crab!
By the time mid-morning rolled around at work, I was ready for a little snack. It was a rainy day and I had already had some coffee, so I opted for a cup of one of my favorite teas with a protein bar.
Lunch at work was nothing special: a sandwich, yogurt, tortilla chips, and carrots from my garden. However, I do highly recommend Wallaby Organic Greek yogurt. It’s not nonfat, and it’s delightful.
When I got off of work, I had a bit of a headache and I needed a snack, so I had a pear with some cheddar cheese in yet another cute bowl. Pear doesn’t pair (see what I did there?) that well with cheddar, but I was in the mood for cheese and that was what I had on hand, so I made do.
I still wasn’t feeling great after my snack, and I was having some trouble deciphering what would feel best. I didn’t totally feel like lying around, and I thought some fresh air might help, so I went for a walk to explore my new neighborhood. However, my little walk turned into a considerably longer walk when I got the tiniest bit lost and wound up on a golf course for a brief period of time.
After I had navigated my way back to the house, I fed the fish in the koi pond and had another small snack consisting of yogurt with a combination of some kind of cereal that I found in the house and Cinnamon Roll Crunch, which is one of the strangest impulse buys I have ever made. Although it made me feel like I was six years old to eat Cinnamon Roll Crunch, I have no regrets. I also had another mug of tea. What else does one do on a rainy day?
I had plans with a friend to go to dinner/trivia night at a restaurant, so I wanted to rest for a while before heading back out. I watched Seinfeld and started reading Gone Girl, which is potentially a poor choice of books when one finds oneself staying in a strange house alone. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the downtime. Unfortunately, my friend discovered that the trivia night had been changed as I was on my way to the restaurant. I headed home and I whipped up some stir fry with various interesting-looking sauces that I found in the refrigerator. It wasn’t bad, but I got a wee bit carried away with the sriracha. Oops. On the bright side, I probably won’t have trouble with my sinuses for quite some time.
After dinner, I wanted something sweet and created an itty bitty hodgepodge of cereal.
I read for a couple of hours, but then I was ready for bed. My dinner was probably 90% vegetables, so it’s not a huge surprise that I was hungry for a snack before I turned in for the night. Plus, eating something before bed helps me sleep and boy howdy do I love sleep. I had piece of toast with peanut butter and called it a day.
This week, I was hit once again with the incredible transformation that has taken place in the last year. Looking back on the girl I was, it is glaringly evident to me that I was under the influence of significant starvation. I never, ever ate until I was actually satisfied. Life was punctuated entirely by meals and I lived in a constant fog of hunger. Any change in plans, like the one that happened with dinner tonight, would send me over the edge. I would have to recalculate my entire day’s calories if one meal, one snack, or even one fraction of a snack changed ever so slightly. I was so used to this life that it didn’t even seem that strange to me. It was unpleasant, yes, but oddly comforting at the same time.
A year ago, I counted out exactly nine almonds to put in my oatmeal each morning, unless that was too many for whatever reason. Then it may be six almonds, or eight almonds. I ate artificial cheese and aspartame-flavored yogurt daily. I weighed out cucumbers and counted the calories in 2 and 1/4 pieces of candy corn. Today, although I could make a rough estimate of the calories I ate, I know absolutely nothing for sure. I feel free from the prison of calorie counting that once held me captive, and it is liberating.
I am unrecognizable from the person I was one year ago. I can take things in stride. I can find joy in the ordinary. I don’t plan my entire life around when I am allowed to eat, intentionally delaying meals as long as possible because I know they won’t satisfy me. I have rediscovered life, and although no day is perfect, I feel proud and grateful for the sea change that has taken place over the last year.